Welcome to the US Weekly Fantasy League!
If you are anything like me, you dread the start of football season...not because you don't like the sport, but because your husband/fiance/boyfriend appears to lose his mind for approximately three weeks. He is consumed (more consumed than usual) with ESPN. SportsCenter. Around the Horn. Your cable bill mysteriously goes up. Upon closer inspection, you realize he has ordered the NFL package. He buys $10.99 magazines and begins creating list after list. He is on the phone all hours of the day, and wakes up at three am, muttering something about changing his lineup.
Ladies, Fantasy Football season is upon us.
I tried to be a good sport. I played valiantly for two years in his league. I believe I (along with my co-coach) were looked upon with a mixture of pity and sympathy. I anticipated Draft day with dread and anxiety. The first year, we ended the season with a winning record only because my significant other helped. Last year, the league came down hard on inter-team 'fraternization' (um, we were engaged, okay? we LIVE together). Without additional help, we ended the season with an embarassing losing season and very little motivation for the coming years.
This year, when my co-coach told me she had relinquished our team, a strange feeling of relief mingled with disappointment flooded me. I hated to give up, but man, did I hate football. At least, Fantasy Football. I wanted to be part of a league, but it would so much more fun and interesting if the content changed. What do I like....what am I good at....Then it hit me.
That glorious, glossy-paged magazine that showed up in my mailbox, week after week. I longed for it. I loved it. I devoured every word, every shiny picture, every stat of celebrity interest. Last summer, our subscription was mysteriously cut off for six long weeks. The longest six weeks of my life. They say you don't know you have an addiction until you are cut off. Well, after that, it was official. I was addicted to USWeekly and celeb gossip.
Who was losing weight? Who was gaining weight? Who attended what premiere with whom? Who was best dressed and - the horror - who was the worst dressed? And most importantly.....who wore it best?
This knowledge should not go to waste. I know millions of Americans have been reading and following celeb gossip for years. Just like knowing who threw the most touch-downs and who rushed for the most yards is important, we, too, should be rewarded for taking note that Sienna Miller is currently going through a 'make-under.' Shouldn't we, too, be given props for knowing - and loving - the Dior gaucho? The reemergence of the peep-toed heel?
So, I propose the answer to Fantasy Football - The USWeekly Fantasy League. Teams are created, celebs are drafted, and points are awarded for making the cover, making an inset on the cover, and making in the mag at all.
Leave us a message if you are interested in joining the league! Perhaps you can start a league in the city where you live! Drop us a line and we will get back to you shortly.